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"Sometimes no matter how much you love someone, they just won't love you back in the same way..."

My heart aches. It is kinda bleeding and hurt and crashed. Let someone go so you can move on, and live the reality as it is, it's the worst feeling in the world. Because it is like to lose this dear person you love, lose her like if she'd died, and get this empty place in your heart where the feelings, and memories, and plans, and dreams used to be.  I can't stop crying. I can't stop feeling heartbroken and lonely. I can't stop feeling I will never have someone who loves me back!

But the worst of it all, is feeling that I will never, ever ever, get to look into his eyes again in this deep, connected, chummy passionate way, or look to the cellphone every once in a while, excepting to see a message from him saying that he needs me, or that he misses me, or that I'm important to him. Because no one ever told me that so often. No one never told me he loved me. No one ever made feel so good and so bad at the same time. For the first time in my life, I lived, I felt and I was happy. But life sucks and can't wait to see us tearing apart, so as soon as gives us this PERFECT gift, steals us it so we go back to the mud puddle where we first started. That's what happens, I guess. You let people in and they destroy you.

He was my friend. And I loved him. But I just could pretend I didn't care this much because he kept on hurting me, unconsciously. 

It's time for me to heal this huge wound that has been bleeding for so long. 

I gotta be strong. I gotta stop think about the past. It hurts too much.